Parent and Child

The relationship you have with your parents in your early years will affect your way of functioning later in life.

So lets start from the very beginning. As a baby you need your parents for survival, they feed you, clothe you and ensure you are safe and healthy.

However, they are also the first and most consistent contact you will have in your early life. Therefore you will observe them as an example of how to interact with yourself and others. As you get older there will be other influences such as friends, colleagues and more distant family members.

However your parents will be your prime example of interaction being your first interaction. You will learn morals and beliefs from them and as a child where you know no different you will be very impressionable.

So for example if your parents are always arguing or fighting you might not understand why but you will understand that to raise your voice is to be heard and listened to.

Or if your parents always punish you for not getting the right grades you may believe that to be worthy of love you must perform to a certain standard. This will then translate into adult life as you make new relationships and connections with those around you.

Are you looking to be loved? Well then your partner will expect you to be in a high paid job of a high social status? Has your friend hurt your feelings? Well then they won’t understand the pain you feel unless you shout at them.

Or it may translate differently.

For example do you want to find love? Well your partner must come from money and have a highly respected job otherwise he’s not going to be enough to fulfil your needs or maybe you won’t feel loved until your partner starts shouting and throwing things because that shows that they care.

So if you want to learn more about yourself and your relationships with others, look at your relationship with your parents and look to your younger self and you might find some answers…